Lessons.

So, I originally wrote this five months ago and decided that I needed to take it down. I think I'm far enough removed from the situation to repost it, and I want to share these valuable lessons. This post is not intended to defame or belittle anyone. I love you all.

Here are some lessons that I'm learning:

• First and foremost, you cannot deeply love someone if you don't know them. Butterflies can dance around your tummy, songs can stick in your head, but if you don't know a person, you are simply infatuated with their projected self. Until you see the ugly parts and God still calls you to their life, don't say that you love them.
• When someone says, "God told me we're supposed to get married" or something along those lines, and you don't feel a resounding YES! in your heart, be extremely cautious with how you proceed in the relationship.
• You can care about someone who doesn't reciprocate, but it's not a good idea to talk to them about marriage. How do you know if they love you? Read 1 Corinthians 13. Will they be perfect? No. But, they should look something like that. If that list does not resemble your significant other, break up with them.
• Don't talk about marriage prematurely. That's just dumb. After choosing Christ, the choice of your marriage partner is the most important decision you will ever make. If you're not ready to give or receive a ring, don't go there. Those extremely emotional conversations deepen your relationship to an unhealthy level if you aren't truly ready to get married.
• Everything worthwhile takes time. Microwave relationships are like microwave grilled cheese sandwiches. They don't take as much time or effort, but they are a lame, soggy, stale substitute for the real thing.
• If your relationship has more red flags than a Spanish bullfight, get out of it. Don't talk yourself into staying.
• People who truly respect and honor others will keep their word.
• The object of your worship will be the subject of your witness. So, if your boo rants about random things more than said boo talks about Christ, they probably aren't growing much in their relationship with God. Does that mean the only thing you should ever talk about is Jesus? No. But, people talk about what they're excited about. Be with someone who is excited about Jesus.
• Women, you deserve to be treated well. You are not objects.
• Men, you deserve to be respected. You are made in the image of a powerful God.
• "If I did it for you, I'll do it to you." If the person you're dating went through a drastic emotional overhaul to get into your relationship, they'll probably do the same thing to you for someone else. If they cheated on someone to be with you, they'll cheat on you to be with someone else. 
• Unless God calls them into your life, you are just another person that they are dating. Things ARE different with you, but that's only because you are different from every other person in the world. The person you're dating is still the same.
• If someone tells you that you are settling and you don't have legitimate reasons to prove them wrong, that friend is probably right. Listen to them.
• If your relationship with God falters as a result of dating someone, get out of that relationship. You need to be with someone who is building you up. Don't run this race with an orangutan on your back.