Nothing.

It's from the deepest wounds
that beauty finds a place to bloom.
And, you will see before the end
that every broken piece is
gathered in the heart of Jesus
and what's lost will be found again.

Nothing is wasted.
Nothing is wasted.
In the hands of our Redeemer,
Nothing is wasted.

-"Nothing is Wasted" by Jason Gray


I prayed these lyrics as I drove to Harrisonburg on August 17th, reeling from the aftermath of an impulsive tornado of a relationship.

My anger, confusion, and pain escalated until I couldn't stand myself. How could I squander 154 precious days?

How could I be so stupid?

My record of poor life choices is pretty short. I've been blessed with parents who love me and taught me how to do the right thing, regardless of anyone else's behavior. Growing up, I only got in trouble for lost homework and my disaster bedroom.

This relationship was the only choice I'd really ever regretted.

The month following the break up, I moped in a whirlpool of regret. I listened to that song every day and hoped it rang true. I read and reread this post from a few months prior. I knew the truth; I knew that I had been forgiven and that God will never stop loving me, even when I'm not perfect. But, everything still hurt. We never heal fast enough. I kept telling friends that I just didn't know how to do this whole break up thing.

"In the hands of our Redeemer, nothing is wasted."

I listened to that song on the way to work this morning and burst into a full smile. My pleading prayer has become a glorious testimony.

God continues to use my relationship and following break up to encourage the people in my life. I've learned so many things about myself, relationships, and God from all of this. I've had so many opportunities to show God's restoration and redemption in my heart and share it with others.

Some very dear friends are experiencing many of the same things that God just carried me through, and I can tell them that God's grace is sufficient. And, I tell them from experience. I speak what I know.

Nothing is wasted.